The Reluctant Naturalist

I can’t eat WHAT?

I love Frosted Flakes. There I said it. Give me some Lucky Charms too. Oh, and some frozen lasagna. I love the Stouffers all-veggie kind. That’s healthy right?

Ok, so I know it isn’t good for me. I went through Weight Watchers and got my Lifetime Pin (meaning I lost the weight and know how to eat healthy when I want to). So what’s the big deal? Eating bad occasionally can’t be that bad can it?

 Well, apparently my body thinks it can.

I have had an infection for over 2 years (yeast, if you must know). I have been to four doctors that have put me on all sorts of drugs/steroids to fix it. This ended causing other problems and side effects. They did a DNA test to find out what specific type of infection it was, but even then they couldn’t cure the stupid thing. Finally, they wanted me to go on a drug that, according to Wikipedia is a “drug of last resort, causing among other side effects, chronic renal failure.”

 Um, no.

 That, my friends is where I drew my line in the sand. I forked out the cash to see a naturopath that was highly recommended to me by several friends. After several fascinating tests the doctor told me to cut out mint, potatoes in all forms, and not to eat fruit and sugar within six hours of each other (Disclaimer: this was a diagnosis specific to my body and my situation and is not meant to be a cure-all for anyone).

Normally I am very skeptical of these types of things. I have not been so kind to all those gluten free people that I know. A little bread wont hurt you will it? But, after trying everything else and being told that if I do this diet, and used the natural supplements that they recommended, my naturopath believes my infection will clear up in one week.

One week? Seriously??!??

This I had to see. I could do anything for a week. Right?

I jumped in. But I had no idea what I was getting into.

The doctor gave me a list of what types of things have my food intolerances in it. The list was three pages long. For potato I had to avoid most canned foods, any enriched pasta (B vitamins are generally grown on potato starch), MSG, dextrose, iodized salt (potato starch makes the iodine stick to the salt), and most yeast. Just to name a few things. For mint I have to avoid peppermint (good bye peppermint mocha), most toothpastes and many chap sticks. For the sugar and fruit problem it was just simpler to avoid non-natural sugar because fruit is in almost everything. So, no sugar – powdered, brown, whatever. No candies, unless naturally sweetened (good bye my Dark Chocolate Dove friends).

Then they told me that I couldn’t just trust the ingredient list on my food labels. The companies don’t have to list the bottom 2% of what they put into the food.

 Lots of food has my intolerances in it and they don’t even list the potato on the label!

For example, many eggs are washed in a potato or fruit solution and that absorbs into the egg. Then they gave me a list of foods that they personally tested. It was 27 pages.

 All the food in the world and I only get 27 pages to choose from?

Overwhelmed doesn’t come close to how I was feeling at the moment.

All I knew was that I had to switch to more natural food. Pre-packaged food was a thing of the past. Eating out? A laughable thought until I knew what I was dealing with, and baking was about to become a scientific endeavor.

I had to push on over the mountain of information set before me and figure out my new natural eating habits. Without meaning to I became a naturalist – with food anyway. The day I start recycling my veggie oil to fuel my car is not in my near future. I’ll think about herbal medicines and cleaning supplies another day.

 I’ll skip over the six hours of shopping I did over the next few days. I’ll block out the only time I have ever let my five year old play his Kindle in the shopping cart so I could compare food ingredients on almost all items to my 27 page list (I’m still recovering from this insanity).

Lets go to my first meal. It is a family staple at our house that I had to revamp for the purposes of my new diet. We call it the Throw Together. It is an old recipe I got from my grandmother (she called it an Oven Put-Together, but I find the name not to be violent enough since I usually make it when I am in a super-big hurry).

Recipe for Throw Together (adjusted for my diet in italics):

•  1 lb ground beef, hormone free (penicilin is often added to meat and it is grown on taters)
• 1 Tbs Minced Garlic (I checked the label and no salt was added to mine)
• 2 Tbs Salt (Sea Salt without dextrose, I have to check the label)
• 1 1/2 onions, chopped (no adjustment)
• 1 green pepper, chopped (no adjustment)
• 1 tsp chili powder (it took forever to find one without salt added)
• 1 can organic, salt-free tomatoes (this particular kind was on my list)
• 1 can kidney beans, organic and salt free (also on the list)
• 3/4 cups Minute Rice–had to find an organic, pre-cooked rice (Thank You Trader Joe’s, or I could have pre-cooked organic rice myself and added it in)
•  Sprinkle with cheese (I had to find an organic cheese with sea salt)

And for those of you that are interested- you brown hamburger, onion  and green pepper then add all the rest and bake at 350 for about 45  minutes. Sprinkle with cheese.

Back to the meal:

It tasted so good! My hubby, who made the meal for me (he loves to cook and I was still twitching from my insane shopping trip) was oohing and awing over the rich color of the meat as he browned it and the aroma of the chili powder that wasn’t diluted with salt.  The meal itself was delicious. It was denser somehow and the flavors were stronger. We ate less and felt better! The couple bucks that we spent for better food seemed worth it. The meal even lasted an extra night because of our adjusted portion sizes.

Looking back I find that – intolerant foods or not – my meal was just plain healthier and more filling. Who knew? It was obvious to me that I would spend more to eat healthier, but the idea of filling up my tummy and my husband’s tummy with less? Well, that should be exciting to anyone (in my over-stated opinion – that is).

After 24 hours on this diet I was feeling so great! I woke up awake. Not the kind of caffeine induced fog of alertness that I usually require after 10 snoozes on my alarm clock. But the kind of awake that happens when your eyes just pop open in the morning and you feel relaxed and comfortable, but ready to DO something – that kind of awake.
There may be some people reading this that already know exactly what I am talking about. I bet they feel this glorious way Every. Stinking. Day. Well, this is a rare treat for me. I am awake on Christmas Morning (no idea why) and maybe six to ten other random mornings throughout a year. I was excited.
 Then Day Two happened: At lunchtime a wave of exhaustion rolled over me as I ate my fourth bite of my Aunt Millie’s chicken salad (I love this southern salad since there is no lettuce in it, but I digress). I recognized this confused sleepy feeling. It was how I normally feel all day – every day.
I decided to backtrack through the food I ate that day. Turns out the healthy coffee cake that my husband and I stayed up late to bake the night before was the culprit.
My body did not care that I ground my own soft white wheat. It snubbed the use of the coconut sugar. The problem was the Crisco that I used. The label didn’t mention any potato on it, but when I cross-referenced my tested list from my nutritionist it came back that Crisco had the trifecta of potato, sugar and fruit in it. Grr.
I was so tired that I had to take a nap. The fog didn’t lift until after I had 2 potato free meals – roughly six hours later.

So I went to bed feeling more awake, but also more discouraged. This was going to take a bit of practice to get potato free down pat in my mind.

I’ll report my progress soon—

Erin, The Reluctant Naturalist

Erin is a stay at home mom of two, wife of one. She spends her days homeschooling, shopping, cooking, chauffeuring children and dreaming of chocolate chip cookies. She ponders the important questions in life like ‘should I make my bed if it’s just going to get messy again in 15 hours?’ and ‘why on earth does ice cream have potato in it?’ Look for her novel in a decade. It will rock your world.

 
This article is intended for informational (and inspirational) purposes only and is in no way professional or medical advice.  Please see the appropriate healthcare professional with your specific medical concerns.