10 Kitchen Rules Worth Breaking

10 Kitchen rules worth breaking


It’s not that I am rebellious; it is that I question everything.  No really, everything. How my parents ever survived me I am not sure but there is a crown in Heaven just for it.  At least, so they tell me (repeatedly).  I think that sometimes we do things as they have always been done, or we hear a singular criticism about how the salsa isn’t “authentic” or we pick up on the social more’ that we never quite understood ourselves.  So read on, I am giving you permission to break a few rules.  Of course, I am not the one who has to live with the consequences; but these are rules that I myself occasionally break so I am not just being a bad influence, I promise.

 

That’s not “authentic” ethnic food.


Bubble Tea

My herbal bubble tea–a healthy & American spin on an Asian flavor

Ethnic foods can be made to fit your culture, your cupboard.   Do not be a purist, except for those special occasions and even for the love of it.   But more people do not cook ethnic foods at all for fear of getting it wrong, and they are missing the best flavors of their lives. 


Kids only eat tan food with breading.


Stuffed Tomatoes with Bacon

My kids cannot get enough of our stuffed tomatoes recipe–but it’s not typical kid fare.

Do not feed kids kid-food (exclusively).  My momma used to say that “no kid ever died for skipping a meal” and she is right.  Mine hunger strike occasionally.  Okay, more than occasionally.  Maybe we need to define “occasionally”.  <cough>… But  don’t  assume kids won’t eat it.  The hotdog-french fry-nugget routine has more parents defeated than just about any other area of parenting.  You tried making tofu once and they hated it, so you are convinced that anything with an unusual name or ingredient list is off limits.  Well goodness, I would hate it if you served it to me, too…so there is a logical limit to all of this.  Just the same, you can get them to eat <some of> it, and not just by the “or else” method.  Here is my trick—rename the food completely and keep trying! Make it fun, eat it with chopsticks, or make everyone wear fake flower lei.  My kids hate some things and love others—that’s just the way it goes.  But tonight happens to be Falafel night & they are super-excited.   One kid hates hummus but loves falafels.   Another kid hates oatmeal but loves porridge pancakes.  They all hate onions but love frittered onion blossoms.  Go figure.   

 

“I’m so sorry, I understand if you pass on that.”


Flaming Figgy Pudding



No apologizing.  Arrogant nonchalance instead. This applies more to company than anything: you act as though you MEANT to burn brown the potatoes! Call it Cajun and fake it.  There are some in the crowd who will not notice.  And for those that do?  Well, maybe you can use the opportunity to invite yourself over to their house for dinner so that they can teach you their technique. 

 

“No, you go sit with the others in the living room while I finish up in here.”


Volunteer


Let the guests get into the kitchen with you.  You know this routine of kitchen etiquette—the guest is supposed to politely offer and you are supposed to politely refuse.  Why?  They asked; either you will train them to not ask next time, or they will jump right in and you’ll laugh and talk through dishes.


Always go to bed with the perfectly scrubbed kitchen


"How To Maximize Your Counter Space"

                                   Read “How To Maximize Your Counterspace” for some great tips!


Okay, this is a nearly-always rule if you can swing it.  But you are a normal, overextended person with unexpected things in your day.  Give yourself some grace.  No one wants to wake up to the sink and counters full of dishes, but if you do?  The world will keep spinning. 


Meat-n-potatoes. 


Scrubbing Potatoes
Okay, so if you’re gonna follow the rules, get this cute little veggie scrub brush!

This will likely mean nothing to you unless you are from the part of the country that eats by formula, like myself.  Breaking your family of this “rule” will save tons of money, give you license for creativity, and help you better use up leftovers in different ways without stressing about the plate’s compilation.  Breaking your family of the formula is the trick—really, really not easy to do. My father could never get over eating curry at my house (“where’s the pork chop?”).   But distract them by the flavors and they might eventually come around. 


That’s not a breakfast food. 


Leftover Pizza

I make a killer pizza crust, which is the same recipe I use for Focaccia bread.

Why not?  Is it healthy? Is it something, that by the end of the day, you would have consumed anyway? Okay then.  Chef Nancy once told me that homemade ice cream is their favorite breakfast!  I personally have a limit to this: I had to put my foot down with my 3rd generation Italian hubby.  No garlic before 10am.  And THAT is a rule I will not break. 


Low-Fat/No-Fat. 


No Fat


Eat fat.  Lots of fat.  Lots of butter, lots of cream, and lots of natural, healthy animal fats that are rich in vitamin D and omega 3 and all other things your brain and body need for full functioning.  But this is not just any fat, oh no.  This is the real stuff that you enjoy because your body actually recognizes it as real and nutritious.


Every nutritional statement you have seen on t.v.


Label Free Zone


Your body needs traditional, wholesome foods that grow from the ground or come from an animal—if it was “formulated” it is not food.  There is no “healthy balance” to manufactured chemicals foreign to your natural digestive system.


The pyramid, plate, or however the “new guidelines” are shaped. 


Does your stomach turn when you watch her describe “healthy whole grain“? It should.  If not, I’m assigning the Pantry Paratus blog archives as homework.


The history of the food pyramid tells me that they don’t have it completely figured out.  The FDA cannot entirely make account for the modern processed shelf fodder nor for how the individual body responds to it.  People have been eating seasonally for millennia quite successfully.  Healthy pregnancies were common in those cultures of traditional and natural foods, whereas infertility in our modern soy-laden menu has peaked in recent years.  I’m not an expert but it is obvious to most that for all of our nutritional experts and lunch programs and reconfigurations of the dietary guidelines, malnutrition (as are food allergies, diabetes, heart disease, and cancer rates) in our country is too high. 

 

Pantry ParatusObviously, you need to seek medical advice and to follow it as applicable.  But if you “saw it on a commercial once” or a t.v. doctor’s soundbyte does not stack up to the real research available through amazing organizations like Weston A. Price Foundation, then I would say…rebel a little. 


Gotta go clean the kitchen before bed,

Chaya




Proviso:

Nothing in this blog constitutes medical advice.  You should consult your own physician before making any dietary changes.  Statements in this blog may or may not be congruent with current USDA or FDA guidance.


 

 

 

 

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Figgy Pudding on Fire:: skeggy via photopin cc

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