{"id":2915,"date":"2015-02-20T05:19:04","date_gmt":"2015-02-20T05:19:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pantryparatus.com\/wpmigration\/?p=2915"},"modified":"2015-04-29T18:41:00","modified_gmt":"2015-04-29T18:41:00","slug":"4-steps-to-sanity-setting-priorities-for-a-healthy-homesteading-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pantryparatus.com\/articles\/4-steps-to-sanity-setting-priorities-for-a-healthy-homesteading-life\/","title":{"rendered":"4 Steps to Sanity: Setting Priorities for a Healthy Homesteading Life"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"4<\/p>\n

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I surprise people when they discover I\u2019m an introvert; I am a bit overdramatic in storytelling and the first to show up, with dessert in hand, to every party. \u00a0But here are some personality traits common to most successful homesteaders:\u00a0 I draw my strength from being alone, and I measure the day by its\u2019 accomplishments.\u00a0 <\/strong>Even yet, my thirst for life often takes me everywhere from sewing costumes at midnight just days before the performance, to baking 4 dozen cupcakes for the car wash & bake sale. Can you relate?
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

Everyone must learn to carve their own limits; some of us never do.\u00a0 <\/strong>Several years ago, a friend stepped into my life and took care of the homestead and my children for nearly 2 weeks so that I could attend a Permaculture Design Course.\u00a0 I gave my friend the quick \u201chow to\u201d on Pantry Paratus order fulfillment, I delegated my church responsibilities, told the kids they were on a 2 week Homeschooling vacation, and I planned to do the rest from the road myself (customer service, product inventory, you get the idea).<\/p>\n

Yes, she is the dearest of friends.\u00a0 And I can still hear her South African accent and see the fiery look in her eye when I came home.\u00a0 \u201cYou are going to sit down, and you are going to listen to what I have to say.\u201d\u00a0 I was about to hear tough love. \u00a0\u00a0<\/strong>She started by giving the list of things that are normally my responsibility that she did not fill, \u201cI didn\u2019t pay bills, I didn\u2019t teach Sunday School, I didn\u2019t write blogs, I didn\u2019t answer customer\u2019s emails or phone calls, or bake everything from scratch; I didn\u2019t homeschool 3 children, I didn\u2019t even clean!\u00a0 You cannot tell me that you sleep, eat properly, or rest.\u201d\u00a0 She continued: \u201cYou are slowly killing yourself.\u00a0 You say it is all important to accomplish, but who will do so if you are dead?\u201d<\/p>\n

I smirked.\u00a0 She was being overdramatic.\u00a0 Right?\u00a0 She continued, \u201cIf you make everything the same level of priority in your life, you are, effectively, choosing to not prioritize.\u00a0 You are saying that, with everything holding equal importance, that nothing at all is important.\u201d\u00a0 <\/strong>Although I disagreed with her at the time, I was so taken aback by her brutal honesty with me that I obeyed her like my mother\u2014I resigned from teaching Sunday School and hired a local teenager to watch the kids for me one morning a week so that I could stay up on things like balancing the checkbook (instead of staying up late after their bedtime).<\/p>\n

I have since discovered the wisdom of her words.\u00a0 They became much clearer to me when I took her advice and stepped back from things.\u00a0 Do you know why I\u2019m writing this now?\u00a0 I\u2019ve fallen back into the same tendency.\u00a0 People of action find action, and the action finds them, too.\u00a0 People who take responsibility inherit responsibility. \u00a0<\/strong>It may be my temperament, my personality, \u201cwho I am,\u201d but I do not have to let it master me.<\/p>\n

This week, I spoke to the Sunday School Director again and once again resigned (years later, and for the second time).\u00a0 I will be wearing a new hat in my homeschooling community that bears a lot of responsibility.\u00a0 How do I know what responsibilities to accept, what to decline, what to quit?\u00a0\u00a0 Here are some things I have discovered:<\/p>\n

\"Step<\/p>\n

1)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Start by admitting that you are indeed replaceable.<\/strong>\u00a0 For much of what is accomplished (out of the home, anyway), do not lie to yourself that you are the only person who can accomplish it.\u00a0\u00a0 You\u2019ll find this quite freeing, I promise.\u00a0 Don’t worry, your mama (and us here at Pantry Paratus) still think your special.<\/em><\/p>\n

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\"Step<\/p>\n

2)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 List your life\u2019s priorities<\/strong>.\u00a0 Not the plaque you bought at Target that says, \u201cGod, Family, Friends\u2026\u201d not that.\u00a0 My list looks more like this:<\/p>\n

a)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>\u00a0Maintain my relationship with God through morning devotions and participating in ministry<\/p>\n

b)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>Keep a healthy marriage by prioritizing my husband over my to-do list, having occasional date nights, and communication.<\/p>\n

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That\u2019s just the start, but do you see the difference? It\u2019s having a mission statement for each priority. <\/strong>\u00a0This way,\u00a0 I can evaluate every new request or crisis by this list\u2014if I don\u2019t see it listed, I don\u2019t do it!\u00a0 For instance, if I only had “kids” on my list, then an over-the-top birthday party suitable for Honey Booboo might qualify.\u00a0 But when I specify their spiritual, physical, emotional, and educational upbringing… that’s a whole different matter!\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s called setting boundaries, people.<\/strong><\/p>\n

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\"Step<\/p>\n

3)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>Measure the hour and energy expenditure.\u00a0 <\/strong>Some responsibilities are a joy, others a duty.\u00a0 And that\u2019s okay\u2014but if you dread the activity, it is draining you and not recharging you.<\/strong>\u00a0 If you spread yourself thin, you don\u2019t have room in your life for those things.\u00a0 When I was a little girl I learned a concept by rote memory in a church program that has stuck with me\u2014it was about giving back to God (the word is known as \u201ctithing\u201d) and we said that it applied to \u201ctime, talent, and money.\u201d\u00a0 We all measure money\u2014how much is going towards charity, towards housing, towards food.\u00a0 Have you ever applied this concept to your talent?\u00a0 To your time? \u00a0<\/em>I recommend tracking your days for no less than 3 of them.\u00a0 It isn\u2019t about saying \u201cI wasted a whole hour on the computer;\u201d it\u2019s about discovering what in your day drains you, recharges you, and whether those activities are supporting your priorities<\/strong> (see #2).<\/p>\n

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There were things others thought I should cut out of my life, but I knew that those things recharged me.\u00a0 Like my ducks\u2014I had 40 ducks that took quite a chunk of my day.\u00a0 But rain or shine, Montana winter or desert-like summer, sitting on the ground and having them crawl all over me was better than a full night\u2019s sleep!\u00a0 I do not regret a minute of my ducks.\u00a0 Even yet, I do not have any right now and look forward to the day that I can again\u2026but that brings me to the last tip for the day:<\/p>\n

\"Step<\/p>\n

4)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>\u00a0Remember that everything is for a season.\u00a0 Everything.\u00a0 <\/strong>If you signed up to be the meal coordinator 3 years ago, it\u2019s probably okay to find a replacement now if you need to do so.\u00a0 If you have to give up something you love\u2014even something from which you draw strength\u2014hang in there!\u00a0 You never know how life\u2019s experiences will come back around to you, or what new things you\u2019ll discover now!
\nBe encouraged, learn to say “no” occasionally, and simply!<\/p>\n

–Chaya<\/p>\n

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